Kristin the Intern
by RethinkMiniTots
Summary: Kristin had been an intern with Carlos, but since Carlos has been trapped in another dimension Cecil has allowed her to intern with him. Audio links will be added once available.
1. Bake Sale

Hello listeners!

The sun is high, just like all our hopes and dreams. And like our hopes and dreams it too will explode and consume us.

Welcome, to Night Vale.

*intro song*

Now you might have noticed that I don't sound like Cecil, which is because I'm not. And before you start to worry, he is perfectly alright. Well not perfectly, but he's alive and not held in custody anywhere, which is very good.

Cecil just needed a little vacation, don't you think? I mean, after all, he did just face Strexcorp unlike a lot of us who just coward at the corporations feet. Plus after all his heroics, he still lost Carlos. He must miss him a lot.

I bet he's just sitting on his couch watching re-run's of Bill Nye the Science and clutching his phone. For some reason Bill Nye reminds Cecil of Carlos. It must be the lab coat because they look totally different. Plus Carlos doesn't have that...um, that well, you know.

It's been a few days since Cecil's last heard from Carlos. I think the energy that keeps Carlos's phone running and in service also interferes with the connection a bit. Given from what I've heard from Cecil on Dana, it would make sense. Or Carlos has just gotten distraction with all the scientific mysteries that desert contains.

Oh sorry. Here I am babbling away and I haven't even introduced myself.

I'm Kristin, one of Cecil's new interns. Originally I was working with Carlos but given the circumstances I've been allowed to work here and still get class credit for NVCC.

Oh, that's weird. A note just appeared on my desk. Well I can't say just appeared as I have not been staring at the same spot the paper is now since I last noticed the spot was empty, but this is the first I'm seeing it.

Ah, it's just the news report.

Movies have been banned, in all formats. Educational DVDs and VHSs will be feed to librarians while SciFi movies will be shot out into space. All other movies are to be relinquished to the sheriffs secret police drop box. If you do not submit all movies in your possession, they will know and they will get you.

The reason for this ban was deemed none-of-your-business. Or at least that's how one reporter interpreted the sheriff's secret police's gestures. They did release a statement saying that we won't be hearing from the reporter again and the sheriff also said that the reporter will not be missed.

In other news, the girl scouts are holding a bake sale. They will be keeping all the proceeds.

In order to be more resourceful, all animal products have come from the animals dropped by the glow cloud. _All hail the glow cloud_.

As the bake sale continues, we will have more updates.

Hm, well that's all the current updates. Cecil is very good at talking. I don't mean that in a rude way of course, but he does tend to talk about of things that are not strictly news.

I on the other hand find it hard to think of what to talk about. That's why I want to be a scientist, not a radio host.

Oh I know! I've been working with some of the scientists in town to study spots where the doors appeared. We found that those spots gave of an especially high level of electro-magnetic energy.

I say especially high because everywhere in town gives off electro-magnetic waves. According to Carlos, that's not normal.

Anyways we, the scientists and I, were thinking that the high levels might be what charged and summoned the door portals. If we could only harness that energy we might be able to bring the portal and Carlos back.

I really miss Carlos.

Not that I don't enjoy working here with Cecil. I just…I just miss science, you know. And my lab coat. Cecil asked me to not wear it because it reminds him too much of Carlos.

But Carlos is being rather idiotic in my opinion. Some things are more important than scientific discovery.

Or at least that's my opinion.

*text ringtone*

I wonder who that could be.

Oh it's Cecil. He says I should be getting to our sponsor advertisement. Thank you for the reminder Cecil. If I had realized you were listening I would have not mentioned…a certain someone.

…

Today's show has been brought to you by Samsung.

Are you feeling lonely? Have you realized that you are but a grain of useless sand in the universe you occupy? Does that sadden you? Well of course it does. But maybe being with other grains of sand that are equally insignificant will ease that sadness into a pestering thought you can't fully remember

Samsung, talk to those within your status quo. _Service does not reach Martians or any other extra-terrestrial beings._

Now on to the weekly forecast.

Monday will be hot. So hot that the rubber soles of your shoes will stick to the concert. It is advised that you remain indoors.

Tuesday will produce an orange fog. It will not dye your skin or clog your lungs. Everything will simply have an orange tint for the day.

Wednesday will not have any weather. Everything will be blank and the day will be forgotten.

On Thursday it has been predicted that there will be a sandstorm, however this is a false report.

Friday there is a government sanctioned earthquake. Do not panic. Please follow protocol.

Saturday and Sunday will present us with tangerine clouds that will rain lemon juice.

And that concludes our weekly forecast.

There has been an update about the Girl Scout bake sale! Things are going well apparently, the girls are making quiet a profit too. I suppose it helps that they did not have to pay for some of their supplies.

Even the new mayor and the creatures that call themselves Erica have stopped by for a bite to eat. The Ericas were there at the same time as the mayor and after tentative looks to the council, Dana ignored them.

I'm sure at this point Cecil would have some commentary about this interaction but I'm not very good with the psychology of social interactions. I'm a scientist…in training, not a psychologist.

Well now's as good a time as any. Here dear listeners, is the weather.

*cue waiting for the bus in the rain*

I profusely apologize for that listeners. I had meant to play a different weather track but it seems I have lost the one I was supposed to play.

I really am terribly sorry.

It won't happen again. I hope.

We have another report on the bake sale.

Apparently the Girl Scouts did not have permission from the Glow Cloud _ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD_.

As a result the Glow Cloud came to the bake sale to reclaim the…products.

All of the items the Girl Scouts were selling that used the Glow Cloud's animal droppings were lifted back up to the Glow Cloud. Then the Glow Cloud dropped some sort of tar like substance on the girls.

Luckily the girls have all earned their tar escape badge. They were able to escape with their earnings _and _help all, well most of their customers.

So alls well that ends well, I always say. The girls earned a little money, the Glow Cloud asserted its dominance, and there were barely any civilian casualties. A successful bake sale if I've ever seen one.

Well that's all from me Night Vale. Stay tuned to hear a reading of the complete periodic table, featuring elements only available in Night Vale.

And as always, good night Night Vale, good night.


	2. Your Story

Hello listeners.

Cecil may be away but I am still here for you.

_I am still here for you_.

Even after my last talk with station management.

And welcome…to Night Vale.

*cue intro*

Today, listeners, I have a story about you, you know who you are.

You're fairly discombobulated as you just woke up in a place that is not the same place where you fell asleep.

You're in a small room in the shape of a square. White walls, white floor, white door. Everything, except the door, is concrete. The door is some kind of metal.

The walls are painted sloppily, you note.

On the ceiling is a gray speaker. You believe that is where my voice is coming from. You continue to believe that.

You are lying on the cold ground. Why are you doing that?

You sit up. You stand up. And then you stop to think.

Do you remember how you got here? No. You think on that while the voice on the radio starts talking about something different.

Do you need a little pick-me-up? Feel like your life is going nowhere? Feel like everything is suddenly crashing down on you? _Is_ everything crashing down on you?

Go back to school with Night Vale Community College. Maybe an education will help, though it probably won't.

Now back to you. You have not used you're time wisely. You just sat there and listened to my voice.

My mocking tone urges you to move. But what now?

You go to the door and hesitate. You want to open it but you are scared. Other than the radio voice, which is playing softly, you hear nothing.

You open the door to see nothing but a dark hallway. From the light from your room you can see pipes on the ceiling and puddles on the floor. Where is that light coming from by the way?

There appears to be no one else in you vicinity. It is eerily quiet out there.

You tip toe outside, despite the fact that tip toeing has been deemed illegal by City Council since 1992.

You also close the door behind you. Just in case. I'm not so sure that was a wise decision.

You start walking down the hallway and the radio voice, my voice, follows you. And just as you're wondering why this is, I start talking about something completely different.

Sorry to interrupt our main story listeners, but I thought you'd like to know that the beings that call themselves angels but are also known as Erika have released a date for their new and improved Strexcorp.

We still don't know _what _exactly the Erikas are building, but we do know that it should be done next month. Which is possibly very good news, but also possibly very bad news. The mayor and grand council will tell us which sometime soon, probably.

Now back to our main story. You know, the one about _you_.

You've been walking through the hallway for a while now. And it doesn't appear that you've made any progress. Everything looks the same. Same pipes, same doors, same walls, same you.

You think about going back to your room, but you wouldn't be able to tell which room you started off in. It wasn't a good idea to shut the door after all.

And then you hear a noise. Will you follow it?

You will. And you do. You also worry if following the noise will be a bad idea. It will.

And now for the weather.

[music]

While listening to the weather you lost track of where the sound was coming from.

Which would be a shame, but really there were only two directions and the sound was definitely coming from the direction you're currently heading down.

You're beginning to wonder if the radio host had anything better to report than your story off walking down a gloomy hall with little hope of survival. You also wonder when Cecil will be returning.

I think you're being a bit rude. I think I'm doing an excellent job telling the story of how you stumble upon your death.

Oh. I wasn't supposed to say that.

I guess I've spoiled the whole thing now.

Well...

Remember, don't become a story.

Good night, Night Vale, good night.


End file.
